Some back story here.
Kelly and I were offering our Lindworm Retreat last month and there was a moment of great discovery, great opportunity, that was accompanied by great fear. As the facilitator of the space, I listened closely and began to prepare my response when one of the participants stepped in and shared a context for us all to orient around that almost immediately dissolved the fear that had just been so present.
It was a wake up call for me. I told my friend, mentor, collaborator, Ash Jansen, about the moment.
Below is her hard earned wisdom set to her characteristic, poetic score.
Hello Peter Philip,
I’m chug chug chugging along on a train to New London, Ct. and thinking about you and what you shared about the Lindworm retreat. I obviously don’t know the details and you’re right to acknowledge your limitations (i.e. lack of experience) with the ways the underworld and other worlds can be expressed in the deep work of soul. And you know me, Pete, I’m no phd but i have some indigenous wisdom around that. I say indigenous because I recently read that Science dismisses indigenous wisdom as “anecdotal”.
Well how about that.
It occurs to me that pretty much the only wisdom I’m drawn to is anecdotal. Get that text book out of my face. I want to know what people’s bones know. Tell me what happened to your hands. To your feet. Mouth. Belly. “nether parts” (god I love a good euphemism). And I don’t mean to throw the baby out with the bathwater. I’m on the receiving end of a lot of scientific gifts. If I’m in a car accident you know where to take me and it isn’t to a shaman. At least not first.
So I’m writing to say, for whatever it’s worth, here’s some stuff I’ve learned from experiences beyond normal consciousness….
When we crack open give us ground. (we may need to run, eat some meat, get our hands in a garden or to lie down, be moved into a restorative yoga pose, who knows but be listening to your inner guidance as well)
Do your best to track what’s happening verbally. It may sound like a big word salad but listen to the language and listen for the feeling underneath it.
The cracking is like the crowning of a baby’s head in birth. It’s not that something is starting. It’s that it’s breaking through to the surface. A seed cracks its container and then roots in the dark for awhile before shooting up and sprouting on the surface.
Keep the container for what’s happening simple. Trust it. Offer water. Something sweet maybe. Pay attention to your surroundings. The more than human world offers support, too.
Lastly: remember the one before you is kin. A brother, sister, auntie, nephew, grandfather, daughter etc… What looks like mental illness or instability is its own intelligent response to what’s being experienced. There is deep creativity at work often. When you reflect back on what happened, what you witnessed during the retreat, substitute the one it happened to/through with one of your sisters. Notice any difference in your response? You know your sisters and you know your love is bigger and can hold whatever is happening. Ask yourself when have I been like this? The “volume” may be louder but the song is recognizable.
And… Of course there may be situations that are dire. If someone is violent or you sense that violence is imminent do get help AND stay in relationship as best you can. There may also be situations when someone goes catatonic or seizes. Again, there’s an intelligence at work. Deepen your breath. S l o w D o w n - even as you move efficiently. Slowing down is a function of awareness not speed.
These events are rare and unlikely. If it feels helpful and gives you peace of mind, you can have people sign waivers releasing you from any responsibility.
And listen, these are just some ashes from my times with fire. I’m not suggesting I’m the expert in the room or that I’d know what to do in every situation. What I’m hoping to do is to help you remember what you know. Who you are. How you love. People will look to you to gauge how they should react. Children do that with parents a lot. Know what you know. Know what you don’t know and be willing to engage that. Love love love. Not soft and diaphanous love but that lovelikearock that is undeniable and indestructible.
Like my love for you.
xo ash